How To Move A Hippo
- Tuesday, July 19 2005 @ 12:30 PM CST
- Contributed by: filbert
- Views: 3,388
Hippos
You'll need:
* 1,000-gallon tank per hippo
* 1,000 gallons of water
* Crane
* 1-pound sedative
* Soothing hippo music
* 2 Aspirin (for you)
How to pack:
1. Fill your tank with 800 gallons of water. Start yesterday. Remember, a medium-sized hippo takes up at least 200 gallons. (Just out of curiosity, why do you have a hippo, anyway?)
2. Apply sedative. Take two Aspirin.
3. Hold it, hold it - put the hippo in the tank, first. Start with soothing hippo music, followed by a large winch and crane.
4. Now go relax in a hot bath before the forklift arrives.
WAIVER: We in no way advocate moving a hippo or any animal without the express advice and consent of your local vet or zoo keeper. If you'd like advice from a veterinarian on moving with pets click here.