The “Bollywood to South Beach” Voyage, part 33

The Bollywood to South Beach Voyage – Regent Seven Seas Voyager, October 29-December 18, 2009

Text by Snookums, Pictures by Filbert

Part Thirty-three

December 10 (Thursday, Day 43, Crossing the Equator) –

Empty water glass

We got up and Snookums went to Muscle Mix and then Cardio Tai Chi (it didn’t make a lot of sense during the class, either!) and ate a leisurely breakfast with two fellow exercises. During breakfast the Restaurant Manager talked to her about last night but she told him that Filbert was writing a letter and to talk to him. For once it wasn’t Snookums that was having the issues! Filbert typed a two-page letter, printed it and had the front desk deliver it to the General Manager, the Food & Beverage Manager (he already received two other letters from Snookums regarding different topics) and the Restaurant Manager.

More after the jump . . . We got up and Snookums went to Muscle Mix and then Cardio Tai Chi (it didn’t make a lot of sense during the class, either!) and ate a leisurely breakfast with two fellow exercises. During breakfast the Restaurant Manager talked to her about last night but she told him that Filbert was writing a letter and to talk to him. For once it wasn’t Snookums that was having the issues! Filbert typed a two-page letter, printed it and had the front desk deliver it to the General Manager, the Food & Beverage Manager (he already received two other letters from Snookums regarding different topics) and the Restaurant Manager.

We crossed the Equator at 11:18 AM today. The Equator Crossing Ceremony will be held tomorrow afternoon. We didn’t go to the one on November 6 when we crossed from the Northern Hemisphere to the Southern Hemisphere, so maybe we’ll have to go to tomorrow’s.

While we were on our way to lunch the Cruise Director stopped us to follow-up on a comment that Snookums had written about the port lecturer and how the port lecturer didn’t lecture about any of our ports. Lorraine, the Cruise Director, informed us that Regent has changed the way that port information is delivered and that Destination Services (the shore excursion people) are in charge of port information and that the guest lecturer is in charge of talking about the broad geographic area or whatever he/she wants to talk about. The lecturer we had onboard from Mumbai to Cape Town talked about the ports since he wasn’t aware that Regent’s policy had changed. The lecturer that got on the ship in Cape Town was aware of this new Regent policy and therefore never spoke about Rio, Salvador de Bahia or Fortaleza but instead spoke about Brazilian coffee and the Rio 2016 Olympics. Lorraine told us that Destination Services could give us the lecture/information we were looking for. Yeah, right.

After lunch the Restaurant Manager approached us and offered his apologies. (While we were eating we saw him lurking outside the restaurant and thought he might be waiting for us.) Filbert told him about the letter and about his two major gripes (lack of service for tables on the outside edge of the restaurant and that it seems like the wait staff is focused on getting plates on and off the table with no regard for the guests’ satisfaction) and the Restaurant Manager thanked us for letting him know. Snookums noticed at her breakfast that her water glass never got below half-full before it was refilled which had never happened on this cruise before so we think the word is out about us! As Filbert said, it took a month for us to throw a stink.

After being stopped by the Restaurant Manager, we decided to go to Destination Services to schedule our lecture on Barbados since that is what the Cruise Director told us to do. Well, the girl at Destination Services didn’t know anything about that and could only read us what was printed about the shore excursions. This didn’t surprise either Filbert or Snookums and we went to the Front Desk and left a message for Lorraine to contact us. It just doesn’t make any sense to us for a cruise line to not have a lecture about the ports of call, but that’s what Regent has decided to do.

The Internet was still down so Filbert wrote some of his book and Snookums read her book. Filbert attended the 4 PM “Cocktails with Charlie Cook”. Lorraine called Snookums and explained that she didn’t really know what was going on with the port lectures. (Okay, that’s not what she really said, but Snookums couldn’t figure out what she was trying to say other than she’s not in charge of Destination Services and her job is to deal with Entertainment, which includes the lecturers.)

Charlie Cook in the Observation Lounge

At 6:05 PM we decided to attend the 6 PM Seven Seas Society cocktail reception so we quickly put on our formal clothes. And it was Filbert who wanted to go! What’s up with that? Must be Internet withdrawl. We got there and the receiving line was still going strong so we weren’t even late. 88% of the passengers on this cruise have sailed with Regent before. While we were there both the General Manager and the Food & Beverage Manager told us that they got Filbert’s letter and would talk to us tomorrow. Filbert ordered a Manhattan and Snookums ordered a water with lemon. When the cocktail waiter delivered the drinks, he said “You’re the one that doesn’t like green limes” since Snookums commented to the Restaurant Manager earlier in the day that the wait staff still doesn’t know the difference between a lemon and a lime and it’s getting really old to teach them. Neither Filbert nor Snookums thought that the waiter should have made his snide remark, but so be it! At least Snookums got her yellow lemon.

We went to dinner and had excellent service – imagine that! Then we were doubly surprised when we came back to the room and found that the Internet was up and we got to set our clocks back. Yippee!

December 11 (Friday, Day 44, Cruising the Atlantic Ocean) –

Christmas Cards and tea in the Observation Lounge

Snookums went to Fabulous Abs and then Cardio Groove while Filbert went to two back-to-back lectures – “How to Make Positive Lifestyle Changes” and “Brazil: Development vs. Diversity”. He sits in the very last row of the large theatre with his laptop and surfs the Internet during the lectures and doesn’t necessarily listen closely. His comment about the Brazil lecture was “It was the standard eco-babble.” Snookums also did two loads of laundry on two different decks. She got even more of a workout in by checking the machines every so often on multiple floors.

There was no joy in Voyagerville, for the outdoor barbecue had been cancelled

At 2:30 we attended the “Equator Crossing Ceremony”. It started pouring rain at 2:20 but that didn’t stop Filbert from standing in the rain with his waterproof camera taking pictures. This is a ceremony where King Neptune converts Pollywogs (someone that hasn’t crossed the Equator) to Shellbacks (someone that has crossed the Equator). Lots of food is smeared on people and then they kiss a fish and ultimately jump in the swimming pool to get cleaned up. It looked like split pea soup, spaghetti noodles and ketchup were some of the foods used this time. With the added 2” of rainwater, the actual wood deck on Deck 11 is looking like a flood area with lots of debris (i.e. food) in it. The crew isn’t going to have much fun cleaning this up. They don’t normally have to contend with standing water on the deck due to plugged up drains (from the food!). But, they’ll get it cleaned up and tomorrow no one will even remember that there was crud all over the deck. By 3:30 the sun was shining brightly.

At the court of King Neptune:

Raining on King Neptune’s Parade
The King of the Sea, brings some with him
Our friend, Erin the Pollywog, wonders if this is a good idea
Erin wonders further
What are they doing to the pollywog?
Death by spaghetti
And off to the shower!
KISS THE FISH!
The remaining pollywogs become shellbacks

We went to Marilyn Maye’s tribute to Johnny Carson prior to dinner. Marilyn Maye is a cabaret singer who appeared on Johnny Carson a record 76 times and Johnny nicknamed her “Super Singer”. She has a 1 hour and 45 minute stage show that she cut down to 45 minutes for our show that mixed her live singing with clips from the Tonight Show. She sure doesn’t look like she’s 81 years old!

Our dinner was a dinner for the people participating in the PTV at Sea program with Charlie Cook (political analyst). When we entered La Veranda, we were told to sit at the empty middle table for 6. This happened to be the table reserved for Charlie and his wife, Lucy, and we had a great dinner with them. Snookums has eaten several breakfast with one of the producers of the PTV at Sea program so when we entered La Veranda he said “Snookums, will you go sit at that empty middle table?” and she did to help him out. Little did she know that he was making it special for us! We had a great time chatting with the Cooks–studiously avoiding politics for the most part, talking instead about families and other suitable dinner-table talk.

Next: Turtles and puffers and rays! Oh, my!